I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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