She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
