how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Randomize
