let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
