She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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