So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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