I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
