a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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