Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Randomize
