I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Randomize
