I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Randomize
