My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
oh god was she eating orange peels again
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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