never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
