she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
We left the knife in your bed.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
