his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
