Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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