Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Randomize
