can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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