Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
The beer is more important than you right now.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
