So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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