i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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