i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Randomize
