No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
