I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Woke up backwards on a recliner
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
