Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize