yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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