the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
