idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
