We're facebook friends in real life
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize