yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
