that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
