how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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