Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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