i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
