In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
