that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
