I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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