You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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