ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
This is classic penis vs brain.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
