don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
