I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize