Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize