Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
