I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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