Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Randomize
