This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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