What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
