i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
