Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Randomize
