Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize