This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
